Wednesday, October 24, 2012

1 Week and Failing

One week till my first expected due date.

One week since I announced that I was going to relax and let nature decide if I was going to be a mother someday.

Fail. Major fail.

For two days after making that announcement I felt good. I felt like a weight had been lifted off my back. Then, it all came back like an avalanche. I feel like I am suffocating.
How did anyone expect me to do this? How does someone just stop trying to achieve their dreams? How do I forget the babies that I lost? How do I look at a calendar and not just know when Im ovulating? How do I stop my brain from thinking about all of it 24-7?

Making a declaration doesn't just make it happen.

Wishing and wanting won't make it so.

I failed. Again.

1 comment:

  1. The average smoker tries to quit 8 to 11 times before being successful.

    Some research claims that it takes an average of 66 days to create a new habit. 66 days!

    You didn't fail. The road to "moving on" isn't a straight, upward line. It dips and curves.

    Hang in there. You've got tons of support in your corner. :)

    ReplyDelete