I am now into my second week of my pre-op diet and its finally driving me crazy. All last week I missed eating, especially when I was bored, but I never really felt hungry. The shakes were enough to keep me feeling full. Somewhere between day 7 and 8, I pretty much lost my mind and almost murdered my husband for an egg roll. Then last night I just couldn't seem to make the hunger pains go away. I drank a shake. For awhile, I sipped on a flavored water. Then I had a sugar-free popsicle. Then I had another suger-free popsicle. Then thirty minutes later I had another shake. The hunger just wouldn't go away.
Through this experience, I learned a very important lesson about the difference between mental hunger and physical hunger. I struggled with the mental hunger all week but when the physical hunger kicked in yesterday I just couldn't take it. My stomach growled and churned and finally got so bad I felt sick to my stomach. Even another popsicle didn't make me feel better. As I laid in bed last night, all I could think about was my empty stomach. I awoke in the night several times because it felt like my stomach was burning a hole through itself trying to find something to eat.
After six restless hours, I got up and went to work. First shakes of the day in hand. An hour later when I could have some water I did. Thirty minutes later my stomach was growling at me. Ugh. I tried a popsicle when I got home an hour ago but it only helps for 20 minutes or so. Its finally time for my second shake so I am sipping away as I type. I am trying to drink this one slower to drag it out a bit. I can't take too long though or I won't get enough other liquids in to hit my other goals.
Although this is getting harder and harder for me, I know that once I have my surgery it will be easier. Atleast then I won't have the physical hunger to deal with. I am feeling like I have a better handle on the mental cravings for food. On Sunday, Walter and I went to my sisters for my mother's birthday. There was cheese and crackers, veggies and dip, three kinds of chips, grilled chicken sandwiches, cookies and cake. I sat out by the pool, drank my shake and watched the kids play. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.
It feels good to be on the winning side of the mental game and as soon as I have the sugery I know I will start winning the phsyical game as well. The countdown continues and I am getting so excited. Its almost here!
I stepped on the scale this morning and was down another 2 pounds. Yeah!
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